Stuffed and Bagged

Who knew Fox Soccer’s newly touted “Goals on Sunday” program would be encapsulated within a single match. United were absolutely breathtaking, while Arsenal looked like a shadow of themselves from this past decade.

The big question for Arsenal is “Are you City in disguise?”

Maybe it’s because I count several Arsenal supporters amongst my friends. Maybe I’ve got a lower tolerance for human suffering. Or, maybe my rational mind cannot comprehend what’s just happened.

Amidst all the joy with United’s brilliance, there’s at least a twinge of sadness for Arsene Wenger’s Theater of Horrors. Watching Piers Morgan slaughter the nutty professor in the post-game show brings to the fore the real possibility that Wenger’s days could be numbered. After such a loss, nothing’s out of the realm of possibility, including mass defections by around Christmas time.

It’s a pity, as well, because the Arsenal manager has been a colorful character capable of putting together some extremely attractive, attacking sides. You’d be missed, Arsene.

Ah, but Champaign football certainly reigned supreme today at Old Trafford. The only blemish on an otherwise splendid day occurred involved Danny Welbeck injuring his hamstring. Get well, Danny-boy.

Here are five things we’ve learned from this match.

First, Arsenal lack a spine in more ways than one. There’s sooo much wrong with the Gunners at the moment, with key players leaving, poor defending, shabby tactics, and a tight-wad management, one stubbornly refusing to pay semi-inflated prices for glaring holes in his side.

Despite these massive problems, yet, Arsenal appear to lack THE quality required in the Premiere League: heart. Case in point, after United’s fourth goal, Arshavin can be seen laughing with Rooney. Are you kidding me?! Somebody should deck that elf, many a Gunner must have thought. What certain North London fans wouldn’t give to return to “One-nil to the Arsenal” days.

Second, it’s clear that Sir Alex’s strategy relies more on overall attacking pace, from every angle possible, than on expensive-and-creative midfield magicians.

Given the form thus far, we’d be utterly shocked to see a certain Inter center-half arrive at Old Trafford by midweek. United could certainly use another world-class center midfielder, but those players remain difficult to land and involve risky sums of cash. Better to give Anderson and Cleverley more time and space to grow and mature right now.

Third, you simply keep repeating it to yourself, don’t you… the average age is 23 years old… they’re just kids… Just look at the class, pace, and hunger within this side. It’s absolutely astounding.

Today’s well-deserved 8-2 score line came against an Arsenal squad sans key players, but a Gunner side nonetheless. This wasn’t QPR after being decimated by injury, for the love of God. No, it’s still THE Arsenal, thank you very much.

Fourth, Wayne Rooney certainly looks comfortable being THE man on the United squad, one well worth of the prestigious number ten.

Today’s hat trick symbolizes his alpha status within the squad and reminds us all what’s he’s capable of after a largely disappointing year much of the last campaign. Wazza’s recovered his form and hairdo while putting to bed the moniker The Boy Wayne. From today forward, it’s THE Man Wayne, thank you very much indeed.

And finally, albeit based on a small sample size, United and City look equally impressive, both with stunning attaching options and depth within each squad.

Money can’t buy you love or happiness, but it certainly can help build a formidable football side. The primary difference between the blue and red halves of Manchester now comes down to age and philosophy, one where United still hold dear a real psychological advantage over The Middle Eastlands.

There truly is a United “way” of doing things, one where no member of the squad is bigger than the club nor the manager. You will never say that about City’s high-priced, mercenary talent.

Thus, we take delight in knowing our kids are more than all right, especially after a serious taxidermy job done to a major rival.

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Back at you after the Bolton match. Cheers to you during the international break.

Color Me Impressed

Well, well, well, listen to the pundits purr about United’s youngsters now when all they too often questioned Sir Alex for relying on too heavily on evergreen twosome for the past two or three campaigns.

After today’s performance, the future couldn’t look brighter, unless Fergie finds his own personal fountain of youth to roll back father time.

Scratch that, I think SAF has found his own age-defying elixir: the task of reshaping this United squad for infinity and beyond.

How cool and confident did Fergie look on the sidelines today – completely at ease watching his new fledglings demonstrate their class right before our eyes.

We all know that United’s youth, at some point, will cost the Red Devils in a tight match somewhere, somehow this season.

But, you’d be hard pressed to find any knowledgeable football fan today without some bit of astonishment at the relentless excellence on display.

In the words of the wonderful Replacement’s song: Color Me Impressed.

What if someone told you last June that United would start Cleverly, De Gea, Evans, Jones, Smalling, and Welbeck at home to Spurs. What score would you have predicted?

Despite Spurs’ dreadful record versus United, especially at Old Trafford, you’d be tempted to think that every dog has it’s day and maybe ‘Arry’s men could scratch out a point away, or perhaps even a victory.

Not a chance. Old United gives way to New United, thank you very much.

Oh, to have been at Old Trafford when Phil Jones, my MOTM, nearly went full field on a marauding run with the ball – you could hear 75,000+ simultaneously gasp and buzz with delight. If my memory serves me correctly, the lad didn’t put a foot in wrong against an extremely gifted Spurs side.

Oh, to have been at Old Trafford when De Gea picked up his first clean sheet, including a drag-back with van der Vaart closing in and fouling the lad. Confidence? Certainly. Stupidity? Absolutely. It’s all part of the learning curve for the youngster.

Oh, to have been at Old Trafford when Anderson and Welback picked open the Spurs defense to see Ander-son-son-son score and break out into the electric boogie, Crouchie-style. Brilliant, that is.

But, alas, today’s match was brought to yours truly via TiVo, after work on a beautiful evening in Minneapolis where I sat inside after undergoing the usual media blackout in the afternoon.

As a Red Devil, we’ve come to expect greatness, thanks to Sir Alex Ferguson.

Like you, I’ve been caught up in United’s wonderful diversion from the rest of the world’s cares, one where it never ceases to amaze these many-odd years on how the Red’s relentless success still finds ways to surprise and delight you, much like Mr. Jones’ foray up field earlier this evening or Welbeck’s clever back-heeled pass.

Besides, name another club that can net a £40m sponsorship for their domestic training kit? Yes, training kit, a remarkable bit of business.

Thus, the kids and the global brand will be all right indeed.

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Back at you after the Arsenal match. Cheers.

Job Done

It wasn’t pretty at times, but it’s three points on the road nonetheless. And it all started so well, too, with United clearly bossing play in the first twenty-odd minutes of the match until the moment that will hound the Red Devils new number one.

You just need to keep reminding yourself that it’s early days, yet this feels like a festering issue, one that could possibly derail another Reds keeper.

Watching the match at the pub, THE stat discussed ahead of kickoff was that De Gea allowed the most goals in La Liga from outside the penalty box. Not a good omen. And already, the United faithful feared another keeper draught such as the one that followed Peter Schmeichel.

Yet today’s howler came from well within the box, with the keeper taking the right angle but inexplicably failing to get down on what now-pundit Gary Neville called a “routine save.”

How long can Sir Alex go with De Gea, when clearly today, his mistake and failure to command his air space unnerved his backline?

Normally, you’d give young players time to adjust to their new surroundings. And, all things – er, prices – being equal, it appeared Lindegaard outplayed De Gea during United’s summer tour. Advantage Lindegaard.

Right now, Fergie faces an unenviable dilemma.

Pull the keeper and risk a blow to confidence. Play the keeper and risk more mistakes when he clearly isn’t comfortable with Premier League air space let alone long range efforts on goal.

I’m typically not one to overreact, especially with decisions at the helm of the United ship, but why not start the Dane and let De Gea ease into things more as a Red Devil?

Lindegaard commanded his backline while on tour in the States and appeared in great form. I know De Gea’s an excellent close-range shot stopper. I know De Gea’s is incredibly young, needing time and space to grow.

But should that learning curve come immediately against the likes of Spurs, Arsenal, and Liverpool?

I’d argue: absolutely not.

The English press will be merciless with the lad, as the more he makes mistakes, the more pressure will build on him, his team and his manager. Surly, there will be a new knick-name a la “Calamity James” in the offering soon, with “De Gaffe” the early bookies favorite, to greet the United squad in the papers throughout the campaign, and dare I say, his English career.

Which is an entirely unfortunate talking point, as there was plenty to like in this match.

First, SAF handed the pairing of Anderson and Cleverly starts. Both played well, earning their manager’s confidence, with young Thomas demonstrating maturity beyond his years as well as the wisdom behind his call-up in the England squad this past week. He certainly looks the part.

Second, United’s ability to come out strong and dictate the pace of the match to West Brom impressed, especially given the Red Devils road woes of the last campaign. Without the mistake in goal, you could easily see the Reds running out a 2-0 or 3-0 convincing victory today. The old adage “one goal changes everything” came to fruition, with West Brom gaining a huge lift from drawing level.

Last and most important, Fergie’s men found a way to win, unlike the other Top 6 contenders thus far, despite Rafael and Evra out from the start, plus Rio and Vidic leaving the match early with new injuries.

Newcomer Phil Jones never looked so good in United Red, with Rafael out over two months and Rio gone now for six weeks.

All in all, United find a way to win, or in the words of another new addition, Ashley Young talking to Sky Sports:

"It's the first game of season, we knew it was going to be tough coming to the Hawthorns but we have a never-say-die attitude and work to final whistle, and we got our rewards in the end."

Amazing how quickly Ashley’s already indoctrinated into United’s culture. But, should that really surprise us?

Earlier this week, Sir Bobby Charlton said in a new book '19' all credit for the United’s success lay at the feet of Sir Alex Ferguson.

"The record of 19 League titles goes down purely to Alex Ferguson, it would not have been possible without Alex Ferguson, that's for sure.

He is the epitome of everything that is good about Manchester United and the ethos of this club. He knows the game inside out. The reason everybody performs to their best is that he is in control, not just of his staff and the first team, but the whole of the club, and as a result it operates in unison.

There is no point suggesting anybody else to be manager of Manchester United, there is no one around who can fill his boots. I hope he can carry on for a long time yet.”

Here's to a job well done for many years to come. Cheers.

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Back at you after the Spurs match.

Lesson Delivered

Well, could you write a better script for demoralizing The Middle Eastlands?

What a stunning last-gasp victory for United and punishing defeat for City. Oh the joy in footballing lessons delivered, eh Wazza, when City are made to watch Vidic lift the Community Shield. “Brilliant, that is!”, says The Boy Wayne.

First, let me digress for a moment with a true confession.

I watched the match on tape delay after spending the weekend at a beautiful cabin on a lake in central Minnesota. Our summers are short and we simply couldn’t give up the opportunity to truly get away. Private lake. No motorized boats. Ah, peace and quiet with good friends. And besides, I’ll have to duck-out on future weekends for much more meaningful fixtures during the EPL campaign.

Thus, watching in the evening, knowing the result’s bagged hours ago only adds another strange temptation into the mix, especially when City go ahead 2-0 without playing particularly well.

Part of me wants to fast forward through another repeat of last year’s FA Cup semi-final. Part of me can’t stand to miss a minute, as football hath finally started.

Thank God the Red Devils didn’t try to fast forward their way through this “meaningless” match.

Yes, you can use six subs in the FA Community Shield.

Yes, it’s the pretense to something much bigger and better to come.

Yes, it’s a one-off, "friendly" Cup, if you will.

Yet, it’s City for the love of God, and you just can’t imagine the noisy neighbors gaining any sort of confidence from this game. No way. No how.

Thus, it’s with much delight that I report I caught the match; including watching another page turned in United’s storied history books.

With the substitution of Carrick, Rio, Vidic , and later Evra, the average age of the United squad was reported at 21 or 22 years old. Remarkable. Today’s young squad outplayed the current version, hands down.

And all the more incredible, Tom Cleverly appears to hold part of the answer to United’s central midfield questions.

Today he impressed yet again with abundant energy, purpose, and creativity moving forward, after his very own MOTM performance against Barcelona’s albeit reserves.

Sometimes the best moves in football can be non-transfers, where the manager provides the time and space for youngsters to take the mantle.

Cleverly helped Rooney dictate play in the second half during a real derby match, which make this accomplishment all the more impressive. It’s still early days, but Fergie appears to have caught lightening in a bottle at the most opportune of moments, immediately after Scholes’ retirement, with this lad.

Speaking of electricity, we must give Nani his due, after his two goals clearly and rightly earned him MOTM honors.

Nani’s performance bodes well for the up-coming campaign precisely because he has taken the challenge presented to him by the addition of Ashley Young. No pouting at all from the gerry curled one. Only commitment.

Nani can be as mesmerizing as anyone on the planet out wide with the ball at his feat, but this isn’t new news, as consistency of decision-making robs this player of opportunities.

Yet, step-by-step Nani’s end product progressed noticeably this past campaign and during this summer’s pre-season. It appears he's finally got it, much to our collective relief.

Thus, United appear primed for another Premier League campaign, with a new influx of youth to a title-winning side.

Surly, with youth comes mistakes, but you can really feel the power that rests within this side, as United were quicker, sharper, and more decisive than their blue counterparts.

A gulf in class still exists in Manchester. Consider it a message delivered.

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Back at you after the Weat Brom match. Cheers.